A Brother's Love

July 24, 2010

Throughout the day today my mind kept wandering off thinking about my brothers. Both of which are not with me anymore. One deceased, the other, the youngest a fallen victim to bad decisions and morale lacking individuals of authority. "A brothers love, is a brothers love"I'm not sure of the origins of this phrase, but I have heard it many times throughout my life. The statement can be no closer to the truth. Since our separations there has been not a day that has went by that I did not have a silent moment of reflection on our lives and how our fates were written. Most times it is a gradual build up to it and sometimes it is just as sudden as me blinking an eye. In regards to the phrase, the emotions that I feel during these moments are just as strong as they were when the events that caused them occurred. When I speak to my younger brother, he says the same thing. Even though we are apart I feel him, always have. The feeling is mutual for him too.The void in my life that has been created by their absence will never be filled. I have come to realize this fact and except it. However, the older I get the more conflicted I become with accepting the fact that this is the way that our cards were dealt. We got a hell of a hand! All diamonds, hearts, and clubs, no face cards, no spades! (a lil humor)The torrent of emotions is amazing; regret, fear, pain, anger, sadness, and lastly hope. The emotional dance always ends with a feeling of hope. Maybe it is Gods way of teaching me to exercise a positive thought pattern. Maybe he is giving me a lifeline to hold on to, to always remember what me and my brothers are to each other, to help me realize that our bond can never be broken, not by death or space. Is that why the reflection is reoccurring so often? Who knows. All I know is that when it is all over I feel a sense of comfort knowing the love between me and my brothers run so deep."A brothers love, is a brothers love"

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